Agree to Disagree
You are at your User Group meeting, or any volunteer organization, and someone comes up to you asks for you to run as an officer or a member of the Board. You are honored, hesitant about being able to do a good job, but you agree. You are elected and excitedly attend your first officers' meeting.
Someone, and it could be you, makes a comment or a motion that generates a lot of discussion. Then the discussion gets heated and personal. This happens more often in e-mail discussions between the officers. When it does happen, you ask yourself, "What did I get myself into?"
When situations like this occur, and they do in every volunteer organization, it is best not to get too passionate about your view or opinion. There are many things that you need to remember.
The governing body is made up of many people, each of whom has their own opinions, their own goals, their own idiosyncrasies, and their own ego. If the board all thought alike, then you would only need one member to make the decisions. You have your own approach to solving a problem, as does each member of the group. They are seldom alike.
Everyone needs to agree to disagree and once a decision is made by the majority, live with that decision. On other issues, your side will win. That is the way it should be. However, we all have been members of groups where some who don't get their way, launch a campaign to attack the issue, the decision, "take their toys and go home", and worse, get personal with the people that voted for the item. Sometimes it gets downright dirty and nasty.
Before your group gets to this point, talk about the problem. You should always start each new term of your board with the topic that will you agree to disagree, but will accept decisions of the majority and will support those decisions.
At the end of discussions, no matter how heated, you should be able to have a cup of coffee or a beer and talk about your family, a movie, or try to solve a nagging computer problem. Don't dwell on your differences from the meeting.
U.S. Congress members fight on the chamber floors, on TV and then go to cocktail parties together. We should be able to do so, as well. Remember that we are all volunteers. We all have feelings. Some officers have stronger personalities, but we all have opinions and they should be respected by each member.
Let's agree to disagree, but remember that the user group or organization is made up of the members and the officers and board members are making decisions that affect every member and the purpose of the decision should benefit the group, not just you. Feel free to read this at your next officers' meeting and use it as a discussion item.
Hewie Poplock is a member of the Board of Directors – APCUG http://www.apcug.org , Vice President – Central Florida Computer Society http://cfcs.org ,Vice President – Fraternal Order Of Eagles, Aerie #4449 http://aerie4449.com , member of the Curriculum Committee, LIFE at UCF http://life.ucf.edu and blogger at http://hewie.net
(Feel free to publish this article in your organization's newsletter, but please give me credit and link to my website. Please email me or fill out contact form if you use the article. Thanks, Hewie.)
